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Archive for the ‘Motivation’ Category

A Guilty Pleasure that Made Me Think

Posted in Hollywood Gossip, life, Mother-guilt, Motherhood, Motivation, Only Child, perfectionism, Procrastination, Sadie, Self-image, Uncategorized, What I want to be when I grow up on July 29, 2009 | 4 Comments »

So one of my guiltiest pleasures is browsing Hollywood gossip sites. Usually I scan OMG for the picture galleries (I especially like the ‘What Were They Thinking?!‘ gallery…) and today I discovered Parade Magazine’s site. (You know the insert in the Sunday paper written for the over 60 crowd). Of course I had to read [...]

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Imperfect Action

Posted in Anxiety, Blah, Boredom, Creativity, Freaking Depression, Hang ups, Imperfect Action, Insecurity, Motivation, OCD, perfectionism, Ponderings, Procrastination, Self-image, Things I can't stop talking about, Uncategorized, Where are my words on July 18, 2009 | 7 Comments »

It occurred to me in the shower this morning that I am paralyzed by fear. Stuck stock still, feet set in concrete. I’m scared out of my mind. And here is what I am afraid of: that I will never change. That I will always be wondering where my motivation is hiding. Wondering what my [...]

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Surfacing

Posted in death, Freaking Depression, Freaking out, Grief, hope, Houghton, Losing a sibling, Mental health issues, Motivation, Moving, My sister, NY, OCD, The Bleak Midwinter, Therapy, Things I can't stop talking about, Transition on February 23, 2009 | 16 Comments »

So I’ve really not been ok. I don’t think I realized how far under the water I was until I started to surface recently. I don’t know how I mistook the murky deep for light or air. All I know is that I didn’t know how bad I was feeling until I started feeling better. [...]

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The Secret Ingredient

Posted in Anxiety, Cleaning, Complaints, Contentment, Creativity, Family, Frustration, Half-Assed, homemaking, hope, House Muse, joy, Learning, life, Motivation, perfectionism, Procrastination, Things I can't stop talking about on January 12, 2009 | 13 Comments »

I have a teeny tiny problem with perfectionism. If I can’t do it perfectly, (I tell myself) I can’t do it. So projects pile up, clutter collects and my life goes from order to disorder in a blink. I have journal entries dating back to 1997 that say the same thing: why can’t I get [...]

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Christmas Recap

Posted in Anger, Cleaning, Complaints, death, Family, Freaking Depression, Frustration, Grief, Hang ups, homemaking, hope, Losing a sibling, Motivation, My sister, Pathetic Scene File, Sad, Sadie, Things I can't stop talking about, Transition on January 3, 2009 | 6 Comments »

Well, I didn’t hate Christmas. It didn’t suck. Surprisingly. Though I did have a few moments where I wanted to hurl myself off of the mountain side because the physical pain would have felt much better than the waves of grief that shoved me hard underwater at random and unexpected times. I found myself muttering [...]

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Reprieve

Posted in Calling, Community, Contentment, death, God, Grace, Grief, hope, Houghton, joy, Learning, life, Losing a sibling, Motivation, My sister, NY, Ponderings, Procrastination, Running, Surreal, The outdoors, This rural life, Transition, Well-being, Wonder, tagged , , , , , on October 9, 2008 | 9 Comments »

I started running after my sister died. Well, running is a little ambitious to describe it. Let’s just say someone walking at a very brisk pace could lap me repeatedly. I always thought I hated running, but somehow–right now–it is the only thing that seems to make sense to me. When I’m running, I feel [...]

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Good For What Ails Ya

Posted in Amazing friends, Community, Funny, God, Grace, Mental health issues, Motivation, Running, Well-being on September 16, 2008 | 7 Comments »

I’m feeling a little better today. Although Dan has been telling me for YEARS, and every book on depression mentions EXERCISE, I finally have begun a routine. I have been sporadic for years with exercise, but thanks to some great motivational friends here, I have been reaping some benefits of those wonderful endorphins. I never [...]

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Pray!

Posted in Amazing friends, Cleaning, Community, God, homemaking, House Muse, Motivation, Moving, NY, Providence, Selling the house, Things I can't stop talking about, Yikes! on June 2, 2008 | 7 Comments »

Quick update… Three families are looking at our house today. At least one of the three is so interested they are going to the bank, and may have an offer for us. We leave in 5.4 days. Talk about the 11th hour. Thanks, dear ones, for praying. Now I must speed to make the house [...]

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Precarious

Posted in Anxiety, Arkansas, coffee, Community, God, Grace, Motivation, Moving, NY, Ponderings, Sad, Selling the house, Things I can't stop talking about on May 30, 2008 | 7 Comments »

I’d like to say I haven’t posted in a while because I’ve been busy, but that is just not true. I’ve been rather mopey–wandering around the house wondering what I’m supposed to be doing. We had the whirlwind of getting ready to show the house and my adrenaline was running high, and now it’s like [...]

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Almost…

Posted in Arkansas, Cleaning, Frustration, homemaking, House Muse, Motivation, NY, Selling the house, Things I can't stop talking about, Yikes! on May 27, 2008 | 8 Comments »

Well, first of all, the Nibblers made an offer on another house. We were next in line if the sellers rejected their offer, but alas, offer accepted. We have now lowered our price and are hoping that will make a difference. We’ll be okay even if we don’t sell before we leave, but life would [...]

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