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Archive for the ‘OCD’ Category

It occurred to me in the shower this morning that I am paralyzed by fear. Stuck stock still, feet set in concrete. I’m scared out of my mind. And here is what I am afraid of: that I will never change. That I will always be wondering where my motivation is hiding. Wondering what my [...]

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So I’ve really not been ok. I don’t think I realized how far under the water I was until I started to surface recently. I don’t know how I mistook the murky deep for light or air. All I know is that I didn’t know how bad I was feeling until I started feeling better. [...]

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It’s the usual summer stress: convincing Sadie that she DOES NOT need to be occupied every second of the live-long day. She does NOT need a friend over the minute her first friend of the day leaves. Same issue, different state. What is most frustrating to me is that I have created this world for [...]

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Here’s my question: WHO puts fluorescent lights in a coffee shop?? What is up? Lamps, people! Lamps or indirect lighting. First of all, there is a glare on my laptop screen. Second of all, have we NOT heard of ambiance?
I am aware that I have lighting issues. ESPECIALLY if it has to do with fluorescent [...]

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So I was talking to my good friend Charlie today about mommy-guilt. She was saying that it comes with every baby. Well I feel plagued with it right now. I mean, simply PLAGUED! I have to keep telling myself that I do not have to be my child’s sister. You know, the one I haven’t [...]

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Since I’m beyond remembering what was significant about the post I lost, I’ll just move on. I haven’t been posting for awhile because 1) I’ve been wheezy sick. If I laugh a little bit, I sound like I’ve been smoking for 100 years (and I don’t smoke, except for that one time in college when [...]

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I have officially morphed into That Insane Mom. Sadie lost her little lovie, Rosie, the other day. It’s her sweet little white bunny that she takes EVERYWHERE with her. I thought maybe we left it at the Dr’s office. So I called the front desk and told the lady that I had an EMERGENCY. [...]

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So Sadie was sick and out of school all of last week. I tried to go into work once (lugging a suitcase full of entertainment for Sades: dvd player, coloring books, stencils, glittery pens, granola bars, barbies…) and why did I think I could get any work done? Oh, wait. I had forgotten. I still [...]

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Every Sunday I plan meals for the week, cut coupons, and make a grocery list. Every Monday morning, I drop Sadie off at school, go to work, leave there around 10:00am, head to our local WalMart Supercenter and purchase said groceries. Sadie used to go with me, and every once in a while, she realizes [...]

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I was looking at the curve of Sadie’s chin–and the way her jaw meets her hairline in the shape of a half-heart–and I thought that I might never stop staring at my child. How amazing to see her long lashes close and point to the spattering of freckles on her cheeks. How amazing is it [...]

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